Whiplashed!

It was a pretty ordinary day. Slower, in fact, than the usual day. I woke up just like every other day, with not even a small premonition of things to come. I didn't even bother to wake my self up completely with my usual freshly-brewed mountain coffee blend. I just dragged myself from the bed, absent-mindedly ate breakfast, did the routine and left for work.
Overcast skies, surreal sunlight, and very light traffic--it almost felt like Sunday driving. I took the expressway like I usually do, but drove a tad slower than usual. No rush. After all, I'd rather be driving to Tagaytay than to work that day. Nearing my exit, I slowed down and took the express lane, with just a couple of cars in front of me. I glided to a smooth stop, maintaining more than the usual distance from the car in front. I was not in the usual maniacal traffic-induced tail-gating mood. Slow, slow day.
Then I felt my car lurch forward a couple of feet, taking up the slack that was between me and the car in front. I got rear-ended! Having experienced eight car accidents within three months last year, my mind went into overdrive. Instinctively, I put the car into park, pulled up the parking brakes, composed myself and glanced up the rearview. All I could see was a wall of dusty white. Then I realized what it was--a bus was smack up my bumper!
Memories of the past mishaps went racing through my mind. The runaway jeepney that lost its brakes, sandwiching a minivan caught between him and my car. The taxi cab slamming into my side from the opposite lane, with a driver so wicked he even asked for a hundred bucks for the damage on his bumper. Or the biker guy flying over my hood, looking exactly like it did in the movies. Those were catastrophies of legendary proportion, but do they compare to being hit by a bus? No way.
I felt blood rushing to my head, veins throbbing, threatening to pop at the slightest provocation. The hypertensive me was freaking out, I could have a stroke or aneurism or heart attack any minute. I have to relax.
Deep breath. Slow deep breaths. And then I stepped out of the car to inspect the damage. The bumper was intact. No visible dents. Even the coat of dust lay undisturbed. This could not be. It was a gigantic, humongous, elephantian, gargantuan bus that hit me. So I looked again. Nadah.
Sensing that the police are only minutes away, I quickly boarded my car, drove to the toll booth and gave exact change to expedite my escape. Inquisitively, the toll guy asked "Nabangga ho kayo?" (Did you get bumped?) "Oo, eh." (Yeah I was.) I replied. And even before the barrier has completely lifted, I sped away far from the bus, the police and the curious toll guy. Clearly a not-so-textbook, not so usual case of hit-and-run.
The adrenaline pumped out as quickly as it pumped in. I soon became aware of a sharp pain at my lower back. With no visible injuries and the car surviving without a scratch, I opted not to immediately inform The Wife of what transpired, the worst being over and so as not to alarm her unnecessarily. So I went on to the office and had the usual day at work, saying a prayer of thanks to God over and over for having kept me from harm. But throughout the day, the sharp pain jabbed at my side. Could it be broken bones? Elevated blood pressure? Punctured kidneys? I began to worry.
I got home that night, thankful that my not so ordinary day was coming to a close, but with the pain still persisting at the small of my back. I related to The Wife the not-so-usual things that happened and possible internal injuries I might be suffering. "Oh, that's probably whiplash." she quickly diagnosed. "Whiplash?! How could that be?" I said, with one eyebrow raised as high as my hairline would allow. And then she explained how the force from the lurching car has pushed me forward, and my stepping on the brakes has stopped the car, stopping my body with it, having been restrained by the three-point seatbelt I had in place. Unfortunately, the bulk of the mass in my mid-section, which remained unrestrained, continued moving forward due to inertia and has placed some strain on my back as a result.
And that second whiplash for the day shattered the fantasies of the macho me, taking my splintered ego with it.

I Remembered!

Okay. I was gonna write about it but forgot what it was I was gonna write about. Actually I remembered a couple of days after that but I was busy with something else so I wasn't able to write about it. Then I forgot I was going to write about it. And then this morning I remembered I haven't written about it yet so here goes.

I too have A. A. A. D. D. -- Age-Activated-Attention-Deficit Disorder! There. The secret's not so secret anymore.

And it is manifesting itself right now...

I booted up my laptop because I needed to work on a couple of things a client wants for tomorrow. But of course whenever I'm on my computer I have to have my e-mail client on. And when it loaded, I went through my e-mails from four or five of my e-mail addresses, replying to items which need my attention. Oh, and then I got to some messages (actually newsletters) that have interesting links and I had to fire up my browser to read through the entire article (several of them actually).

And then I remembered I have yet to post another entry on my blog so I proceeded to my blog's dashboard. Then I remembered my cousin saying she can't post comments on my blog since she is not a blogger. So I went through the settings and finally set it so that anyone can post comments on what I write.

Sigh. And then I remembered that I should be working on what the client wants for tomorrow. So I loaded up my programming tools in preparation for that. But then I remembered that I have yet to post on my blog! I've been meaning to do this for more than a week now so now that I'm on my blog I feel I should finally do it. And as you can see I finally did.

Argh! An hour after booting up my laptop with the intention of working, I've gotten only as far as loading up my programming tools.

Anyway, here's the e-mail that helped me realize my condition...I have to get back to work.

Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D.
Age-Activated-Attention-Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:


I decide to wash my car. As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the hall table. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the trashcan under the table, and notice that the trash can is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the trash first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my checkbook off the table, and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the coke a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered.

I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.
I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.

I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.
Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: the car isn't washed, the bills aren't paid, there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter, the flowers aren't watered, there is still only one check in my checkbook, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you? Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.

Secrets from Within

I've prepared a long time for this... to finally reveal the secret that lies within. After a painstakingly long process of unlocking the cryptic things that run in my mind. I finally have it! The secret is out.

Oh and I was gonna write about it but it slipped my mind. Oh and I forgot what I was gonna write about. Tough luck.

Hmm

Hmm. As you can see, there's nothing going on in Gil's mind.

Check back tomorrow?

What is going on?

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